about a week ago, something kinda crazy happened to me. crazy things happen all the time, but only certain events, endeavours, and experiences have the ability to truly resonate and inspire change – this was one of them, and that’s why i want to share it with you.
i was writing my last exam (a take-home, luckily) of my undergrad in anticipation of celebratory debauchery and a wild, inevitably hectic time at the pogue later that night, and couldn’t have been more excited that my five years of university were finally about to translate into a degree. unfortunately, as i was writing my last exam, i started getting a wicked bad headache and my vision started to blur. feeling as though the killam had gotten the best of me, for the last time, i booted it home, spewed out another 1000 words, and took an awesome nap. later that night, my headache and vision had gotten worse, and though i hadn’t touched a single beer, my eyes were acting as though they were already drunk – i literally couldn’t see straight and saw double of everything. over the weekend, and one FOMO filled splitcrow saturday later, the right side of my face had become entirely unresponsive and lazy, and my right eye wouldn’t move past the center point of focus or to the left side of my vision.
i made a few doctor visits and they attributed my symptoms to stress. staring at an ipad, phone, and laptop for hours and days on end, in combination with all-nighters and poor study-time eating habits, definitely didn’t help. however, my symptoms worsened progressively throughout the course of the weekend and eventually led me to numerous hospital visits, MRIs, and meetings with different neurologists.
by the next tuesday, i had been re-diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS), an autoimmune disease that causes the body’s immune cells to attack the nervous system. the attack i experienced resulted in my double vision (diplopia) and unresponsive/lazy face (muscle paresis). this diagnosis was entirely unexpected. the reason I’m sharing this story is because this experience has made me realize how fragile life is and how it can be so abruptly impacted by unexpected events.
this experience has made me realize how volatile and uncertain life can be. when something that you might usually take for granted is taken away from you, you quickly realize how different your life is without it. life is unpredictable, especially when it comes to health. the thing i am scared of most is that my legs could be next. i’m a runner and if i wake up one morning and one of my legs is unresponsive and lazy, as my face had been during this last attack, i would be at an absolute loss. this is a total possibility and though the chances are slim, it’ll always be in the back of my head somewhere.
the moral of the story is that life is precious, health is unpredictable, and anything can change in a matter of seconds. i know that, personally, this experience has inspired me to make positive change, live every second of life with full intention, and remain positive through every experience. regardless of what curve balls life throws at you, don’t forget that it could always be worse and that it WILL get better – it just takes time and positivity.
more importantly, don’t take life too seriously. value the humans, experiences, and inconsequential things in life that, one day, may not seem so small. beauty and love can be found in the most unpredictable places, and i encourage you to find them: DON’T WAIT.
life is too short to wake up with regrets.
love the people who treat you right,
forget about the ones who don’t.
believe everything happens for a reason.
if you get a second chance, take it.
if it changes your life, let it.
nobody said life would be easy, they just promised it would be worth it.
- k. blackburn
